Excerpt:

“Hang on, I just have to put my soles on,” I call after the kids, who are racing out the door for a trip to the market. The soles in question are two dove-gray, rubber flaps that snap to the bottoms of my slippers, which I have just imported from London. A slipper-transformer that will transition me from scruffy writer-dad to euro-sleek snacks prospector in mere moments. I am excited. I am embracing design.

I have been for two weeks or more, in fact, ever since I ordered the $89 Mahabis convertible slipper, footgear that I had seen advertised so extensively online, I finally had to click. Its webpage features a young, beautiful blonde couple. Him: sporting a man-bun, his beard both wispy and full all at once. Her: mostly Cupid’s bow, likely to be “picking at her eggs” in a magazine profile. Both don their woolen Mahabis. Typeset in front of them: “reinventing the slipper.”

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